TuBee is a place where I intend to passionately share my voice and actively work to empower you—current and emerging leaders. I created this community of sharing because, truthfully, we are continuously navigating, evolving, and growing in our own unique leadership journeys.

Exactly 365 days ago, I, as a C-suite executive went through my own Great Resignation or as I characterized it, my professional Great Divorce. I had recently graduated with my doctorate degree in leadership, and I just wanted a professional moment to EXHALE and press cruise control on the constant demands of being a healthcare executive during the coronavirus pandemic; studying ALL THE TIME; and working non-stop. But instead, what I never envisioned as my next professional step happened. I submitted my letter of resignation and walked away from the mission of an organization that I had felt personally married to for such a long time and that was such a big part of what I like to call, my “professional soul.” What walking away really meant was that I was starting a new professional chapter whose reality I had not foreseen and one that I was not fully prepared for.

The irony of my Great Divorce is that it is the antithesis of who I am. Since I was 18 years old, I have always had my next professional steps perfectly and neatly laid out, with options, of course. This time, I was walking away, venturing into a space and pathway that was foggy and unfamiliar.

And as if the unknown of my professional reality was not challenging enough for me, an onslaught of thoughts and feelings of failure, worries, anxieties would constantly find their way home to me. They had always had such an enormous presence in my life, but they became louder, and they became my steadfast companions, especially after midnight. I compare them to a book club whose members had at least two single shots of espresso and who were incredibly well-prepared, passionate, and available to hold multiple roundtable debates and discussions on a chapter they just read from the book of the month…and this time, the novel was titled “My Life.”

As they held onto their commitment of visiting me each night, I did not know how to ask them to leave or to kick them out politely. But what I did know how to do was to take out my journal and write. I started to find and read articles and blog posts when the roundtable discussions were just too overwhelming, and I needed strength and inspiration to get me through the next hour. The midnight book club guests held onto their recurring meetings and found themselves on my calendar at 12 a.m., I was exploring and finding the value of learning again, reflecting,

and seeking for inspiration to help me cope as I navigated this unfamiliar next chapter.

Much to my surprise, the learning, the seeking for inspiration from other leaders, and the reflection of self helped me authentically understand what I wanted to do. It did not involve getting another executive level position, despite my professional instinct and ego desperately fearing not having another professional accomplishment for my LinkedIn profile. My “professional pause” scared me, but when I found the courage to face my fears and listen to the hopeful and resilient voice I was exploring through reflection, I realized that I did know what wanted to do. I wanted to find my way back into the classroom, even though I had recently graduated. This time, though, it was not at Vanderbilt University, but rather, my own classroom.

Once I started the journey of being a student again, I learned to embrace the three things that helped me during my most difficult moments of my Great Divorce: reflection, learning, and inspiration. So, I am here, sharing it with you because I hope that by sharing, I am helping, supporting, and being of service to you, the current or emerging leader, who may be going through their Great Divorce, or emerging into a new leadership role, or advocating and fighting to build a healthier, more diverse, equitable, and inclusive organization, or working hard each day to show up as your authentic self.

TuBee is my sincerest intention of creating a space

To be reflective.

To be committed to and engage in life-long learning.

To be empowered…to be inspired…to be inspiring…

A space you can turn to and take what you need so that it can serve you. Wherever you may be in this world and wherever you are on your journey. 

As TuBee comes to life, I want to take a moment and say that I am humbled to have you be a part of TuBee. I am humbled for us to learn, strive, navigate, and continue forward together.

That is my sincerest hope.

Banafsheh Azizi 

January 30, 2023